I wonder what's our purposes here in this blue world. I'm sure you've questioned it yourself, I have, many times over, and tmes over and over again.
Ask God. You walk through all this pain, like cute barbed wire, get through it and leave a part of yourself behind. What's the point of trying to hide all the pain in a simple little blog? You can be as happy as you can be at that moment trying to lie to yourself that you're fine and dandy, like a uncaring daisy in the wind. But at the end of the day, are you really feeling great?
I'd go right up to God and tell him, "You're not doing a good job with me" if I could. Rather, I wasn't the one doing a good job.
He has a plan for us? The way i'm tested day by day, the way i'm plagued by such unnerving ideas by some disgusting idealist, the way I bend over in pain and pure grief when I can't control how I feel anymore? You think you know it? This fear? It kills the soul my friends.
I'm amazed at how far i've gone holding onto I-don't-know-what. I'd just come back home playing some silly sad song, gripe on the floor, writhing in anger and pulling the hairs out of both the carpet and my head. Where lies this tell tale answer that you and I look for? I have no idea, people say it's within themselves. Sincerely, i'm not getting a bit of good out of any of this. All this joy that's covering our stupid faces is a simple dumb charade. Behind the curtain is just what it really is. Horror.
Things aren't right, they don't work out.
The picture up above is one of?
S-U-F-F-E-R-I-N-G
This is suffering.
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